Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Unintentional Cryptic Comment

So we're clear, there is no present drama on the horizon. I have a solid history of breast cancer in the family and, since a manufactured scare in college, have been diligent about the annual (or, in my case, more frequent) screenings. I have had irregular biopsies several times in the past few years and this was not even remotely worrisome. What struck me was my doctor's attitude of "you are going to get it eventually, let's bring it on." To this end, the passive end of the treatment scale is a drug to stave it off, or, to be more proactive, radiation to bring it on.

Neither option is working for me at this point. I don't fuck with my body's chemistry unless I absolutely have to and I don't think I'm there yet. Yes, solid history of cancer in the family. Yes, big tits and all that. Yes, other factors that would suggest a likelihood. But right now? I don't have it and I am pretty goddamn proactive about screening for it. They aren't going to find a lump, years after the fact and pronounce me in stage 3. If I am going to develop it, I will catch it early and often.

No cause for drama queen just yet. I simply take issue with the notion that you need to fight a battle where no one has thrown the first punch. After doing some research (and hearing from z), I'm inclined to believe the preventive approach probably creates more problems than it solves, and, in any event, isn't for me, at least right now.

I have a friend who just had a double mastectomy in March and I feel stupid for even worrying about this. I have seen what the battle looks like and right now, I am but a scrappy little kid, wondering if I am going to get into a fight.

But thanks for the concern, folks. It means a lot.

1 comment:

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