Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Thanks, Friend

Sometimes, you find friendship and kindness in the most unexpected places. I have a friend who is going through his own painful breakup,and it has been both an honor and an insightful experience to view it from the male perspective. We 'met' under pretty unusual circumstances and have developed a unique but meaningful friendship. Neither one of us are looking for a replacement for loves or relationships lost and have just paced ourselves towards a long term friendship.

In the madness of the holiday season and my brother's wedding, we didn't keep in touch in December as regularly as we had before, which really wasn't all that regular. We spoke when we wanted or needed to talk to each other, not out of habit or obligation. Sometimes, we would talk about divorce, but more often than not, we talked about anything else. Movies, books, food, politics, Los Angeles, Seattle - and we have slowly gotten to know each other.

I hadn't spoken to him in a couple of weeks when, on NYE morning, about a half hour after my divorce was final, I got an email and a text from him. Both said the same caring words of support and friendship, and I was touched. I sent him back a quick text message of thanks and told him I would be in touch in the New Year. Later that night, as I was scrolling through my missed calls and text messages from my brother's wedding, I saw one from him at 12:01am. It simply said "you made it, K. Here's to a great year of friendship." Another kind gesture.

I fell down the rabbit hole for a few days and didn't return a lot of calls and texts. I finally did a few days ago and spoke to him for a while. After our conversation, I sent him an email, thanking him for, among other things, the best new friendship of 2007, one I intended to protect and nurture in 2008. The next day, I sent him another email, gently encouraging him to resume writing. He is a successful writer by trade, but his well has dried up in the months since he filed for divorce. I included a link to some of my favorite stories of his, with annotations as to why each piece resonated with me.

Today, my assistant walked in my office with a beautiful bouquet and set it down by my window. I was taken aback by how beautiful and positively unexpected it was to see these beautiful dark pink roses and I think my jaw fell open. My assistant said "I don't care who they are from, it is just good to see you're back."

They were, of course, from him, with the most thoughtful note I could have imagined. The man is a goddamn writer. It never ceases to amaze me where you can find sources of support and friendship.


Talix said...

Is this the guy you were co-writing with?

cornutt said...

Heh. That would be no. I am no longer involved with that person.

No, this is a writer in LA who is not directly affected by the strike (columnist for a paper). He is a very thoughtful guy.

Norm said...

You're a pretty kickass friend yourself, you know. This doesn't surprise me at all. What goes around comes around, as the Buddhists say -- or was that John Lennon?